Church at the Dollar Tree

My daughter is in high school right now and having a big youth group is really important to her. There is one particular youth group I have steered her away from though and as discriminatory as it sounds, it is simply because it is a mega church. We went to this church the first year we moved to Vegas. It was a good transitional church. The eight years that followed have been in medium to small churches with small youth groups doing ministry stuff. My daughter has been doing ministry for years. She has been on no less than two mission trips a year since she was eight. This includes a 14 month long stint as missionaries in Canada. The long and the short of it is she needs this anonymity of a big group right now. She is transitioning in her faith with Christ and this is part of finding out what her relationship with God will be. I am confident that she has the philosophical depth to handle religious discussion far beyond her years but I desire her heart to cling to Truth because she understands the pure necessity of it to her life not because I have taught her how to understand it well.

OK long story short, too late I know, but it brings me to this last Sunday. I dread going to this church. But I have conceded for her. I dread the worship/concert time at the beginning most of all. I am literally queasy as I sit there watching a thousand people standing and swaying and sometimes clapping. Very few of them are singing themselves, I imagine either because they don’t know the songs and/or it wouldn’t matter because you cannot hear your own voice let alone each other’s voices among the electric guitar, bass, vocals, and drums of the band on stage. It isn’t my thing. I desire to worship and to invite God into this time and to prepare my heart for the message not be provoked to highjack the sound booth and hit mute on every channel. The pastor is pretty good. I like his messages but I can listen to him on pod cast.

So this last Sunday I take my daughter to this church. I head over to their Starbucks and grab a coffee and browse through the books in the bookstore. I fully intended to go into the service as soon as the big screen TV indicated the band was finished and the message was starting. I fond this book though “My Year Living Like Jesus” by Ed Dobson. It struck a chord with me because so much of this year has been an internal battle of that thought in my own life. So I found a chair and a good excuse to skip the service entirely.

I am discontent with the church as a whole. Not particular churches, all churches. I dislike that “the church” is synonymous with American ideals and rituals with capitalism and racism. I just think we are so far from what Christ intended the church to be. I’m not sure we can ever go back. I can’t go back. I can’t do church like I used to: It’s a lie. I think the organization of “church” is a name, a label that has been redefined so completely it shouldn’t be labeled church. In fact, if I look “church” up in my dictionary I imagine I would find current churches as an alternative definition:

Church            the body of believers who lived selflessly in order to proclaim Christ’s message at all costs and at all times. See Acts 2 (alter. def.  Modern day organizations with altruistic agendas appealing to the masses)

This has been so heavy on my heart this year. I remembered times of pure ministry where I sat with a homeless women and prayed God would provide for her, or watched Holy Spirit worship in Mexico, or took somebody grocery shopping just because God told me to. Most of the divine appointments dearest to my heart are the ones I was open to and responded to in every day situations through the prompting of the Holy Spirit. They were not always a part of a scheduled ministry outreach. I realize I have pretty much dumped it all, baby and bathwater, because of my definition of church and my disillusionment of ministry.

As I thumbed through the book by Dobson I read about some of his ministry opportunities in every day situations because he was just living like Jesus. And that is what he would tell people and conversations would ensue. I have had so many similar situations over the years that I had forgotten. And yet those were pure moments. I sat there and asked God how did I get so far from the pure ministry I longed for? I genuinely ache for that. It was a good church service there in that armchair, me soul-searching, thinking, and praying.

Today was the practical application of my Sunday. The last two weeks have been incredibly hard financially. I mean college days, count-the-pennies-for-a-Taco Bell-burrito, kind of situation. Today I had a little breathing room, finally. I had money in the bank and $30 in my wallet. I was almost finished picking up some items at the Dollar Tree when I turned down an aisle that a man was hurrying up. He stopped me and asked if I could help him. He asked if I knew where a Mormon or Catholic Church was located (interesting he did not ask for a Christian church, or if I was a Christian - but more on that later).  He went on to explain that he and his family were on their way from Utah and they had broken down and he needed $18.37 to buy the part to fix the car (AutoZone was next door). He was almost in tears, the desperation oozing out of every gesture. I just reached in my wallet and gave him a twenty and said God bless you.  He seemed surprised and thanked me profusely I glanced as he was at the end of the aisle and he raised his hands to heaven and lifted his head and mouthed the words “thank you.”

I knew intimately what desperation that man was feeling. I didn’t even hesitate because I knew already before he was done speaking, that God wanted me to help this person if I could. I knew my experiences were probably nothing compared to his though. And I was amazed that of all the aisles he picked mine at that exact moment and for some reason God ordained it. As I was checking out the lady behind me with only 3 items had to wait. I apologized and said I would have let her go first if I hadn’t already started. She was in her seventies and just waived it off saying she was in no hurry. When I got loaded in the car the same woman was getting into her car next to me and again had to wait to open her car door as I pulled out. I told her sorry she had to wait for me again and she smiled and said she was in no hurry she was just a servant of the Lord. I smiled and said I was too and she replied, “I know. I could see it on your face.”

Wow, that was a seriously transforming moment for me. I have to be honest here. I have been impatient and cranky with the human race for quite a few months so this was a rare moment. But maybe something is beginning to happen. I am beginning to crack and I hope begin to have a rebirth of sorts. Whatever it was, it was a significant sign from God that He is not done with my heart or my hands in His ministry. For that I am grateful and encouraged.

This brings me back to the concept of church. Church transformation is deeply personal. In the long run it is ONLY what I do for Christ that counts. I am personally responsible to follow Christ’s heart and His vision for the lost, for community, for fellowship. I am the church. If we get this concept and follow the precepts set out by Christ there would be no need for “organized religion” at all; fellowship and accountability would flow naturally. Is that what “Christian churches” are afraid of?

Think about it in terms of a career. You decide what you want to major in, you go to school, get a degree, get hired, sit in training meetings to tell you how to follow all the protocols of your job, then you practice with somebody, then finally you go solo. You follow all the training so you get good results and favorable evaluations. Isn’t that the same formula most churches use?

Now think about what most committed Christians do aside from their institutional training. Are they really visibly different than their peers in every-day life? Behind closed doors are they living transformed lives? Do they know their neighbors?

I had this radical idea once (actually it happens a lot). Here it is: What if every Christian, in every church, in the Vegas valley committed to one thing; learn the name of every person on their block? Then if they prayed for each person on their block every day for a year, what could happen if our hearts were inclined to those around us in that way? I think revival is what would happen. What if pastors preached that as the only directive from the pulpit? You wouldn’t need to be a Bible scholar, you wouldn’t have to order tracts or memorize the plan of salvation. If each person let the Holy Spirit lead through prayer and a life of visible love what a changed world we would live in.